"If there wasn't suffering, there wouldn't be any need for compassion."

- A Walk to Remember

Moving Mountains

A man was sleeping at night in his cabin when suddenly his room filled with light, and God appeared. The Lord told the man he had work for him to do, and showed him a large rock in front of his cabin.

The Lord explained that the man was to push against the rock with all his might. So, this the man did, day after day. For many years he toiled from sun up to sun down, his shoulders set squarely against the cold, massive surface of the unmoving rock, pushing with all of hi might.

Each night the man returned to his cabin sore and worn out, feeling that his whole day had been spent in vain. Since the man was showing discouragement, the Adversary (Satan) decided to enter the picture by placing thoughts into the weary mind: "You have been pushing against that rock for a long time, and it hasn't moved." Thus, he gave the man the impression that the task was impossible and that he was a failure. THese thoughts discouraged and disheartened the man. Satan said, "Why kill yourself over this? Just put in your time, giving just the minimum effort; and that will be good enough."

That's what the weary man planned to do, but decided to make it a matter of prayer and to take his troubled thoughts to the Lord. "Lord," he said, "I have labored long and hard in your service, putting all my strength to do that which you have asked. Yet, after all this time, I have not budged that rock by half a millimeter. What is wrong? Why am I failing?"

The Lord responded compassionately, "My friend, when I asked yout o serve Me and you accepted, I told you that your task was to push against the rock with all of your strength, which you have done. Never once did I mention to you that I expected you to move it. Your task was to push. And now you come to Me with your strength spent, thinking that you have failed. But, is that really so? Look at yourself. Your arms are strong and muscled, your back sinewy and brown; your hands are callused from constant pressure, your legs have become massive and hard. Through opposition you have grown much, and your abilities now surpass that whcih you used to have. True, you haven't moved the rock. But your calling was to be obedient and to push and to exercise your faith and trust in My wisdom. THat you have done. Now I, my friend, will move the rock"

At times, when we hear a word from God, we tend to use our own intellect to decipher what He wants, when actually what God wants is just a simple obedience and faith in Him. By all means, exercise the faith that moves mountains, but know that it is still God who moves mountains.

Well done, good and faithful servant. Matthew 25:21

--referenced in sermon, author unknown.

It seems like one of the things God has been showing me is my need for grace. Such a simple concept, but one of those things I'm convinced that I will be relearning until I die. There are times where I know that grace has been bestowed upon me, but I refuse to accept it. Like with all my stress lately, I refuse to let the grace of God work these things out. I refuse to let Him be Jehovah Jireh - the Lord provides. I try to make myself good, to make myself righteous and holy, and perfect. Heh. There's no grace in that. There's no God in that even...So, I need to just acknowledge how much I suck..and let God work the rest out...

I was thinking about this one line from "Joy of the Lord": "I am surrounded by mercy and grace." I think about how I forget that I am totally hemmed in, fenced in, protected by mercy and grace. There are times when I try to jump the fence in my own need to try to fix all my problems. And then God brings me to my knees. Where even in prayer, I don't come to Him with a list of requests and petitions. But, I end up with "God, help me please. Have mercy on me. I need you." I can sit for hours on end and just utter those few words....

I like how God weaves things together to teach me things. I've just started reading The Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning. And in the opening chapter, he quotes Paul Tillich:

Grace strikes us when we are in great pain and restlessness. It strikes us when we walk through the dark valley of a meaningless and empty life... It strikes us when, year after year, the longed-for perfection does not appear, when the old compulsions reign within us as they have for decades, when despair destroys all joy and courage. Sometimes at that moment a wave of light breaks into our darkness, and it is as though a voice were saying: 'You are accepted. You are accepted, accepted by that which is greater than you, and the name of which you do not know. Do not ask for the name now; perhaps you will find it later. Do not try to do anything now; perhaps later you will do much. Do not seek for anything, do not perform anything, do not intend anything. Simply accept the fact that you are accepted.' If that happens to us, we experience grace.

- Paul Tillich in Shaking the Foundations

Paul says in 1 Corinthians 15:10, "But by the grace of God I am what I am, and His grace toward me did not prove vain; but I labored even more than all of them, yet not I, but the grace of God with me."

I got demoted.

But, I don't care. It's ok.

It's odd that Phil wrote about accountability. Jessie and I talked about accountability during discipleship yesterday. She said she was gonna plop about it, and I said I'd post about it. I will post about it once I get my DSL up and running again...

It's a very interesting word/concept that I think we in the modern/post-modern church don't really understand. And I'll leave it at that for now.