The Lord your God is with you,
he is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you,
he will quiet you with his love,
he will rejoice over you with singing.
Zephaniah 3:17
What imagery. I just see a father holding up his little baby, flying the baby like a little airplane, arousing giggles from the child. I see a father sitting with a crying child, holding the child's hand until the crying ceases. I see a father at a wedding, rejoicing over how his child has grown into a beautiful adult.
God loves me. It's that simple. *content sigh*
February 27, 2002
February 24, 2002
February 20, 2002
CONGRATULATIONS JESSICA!!!
On this day...you now have independence. Well, kinda. No insurance and no money with which to buy gas. But, we'll just pretend that you are now free to roam the world. Heh. You'll probably only get as far as Fantasia for a while..maybe Valley Fair...oh, and now you get to go to the River! YAY!
I'm happy for you. Heh! I'm happy for me! I'm just happy. And thirsty.
On this day...you now have independence. Well, kinda. No insurance and no money with which to buy gas. But, we'll just pretend that you are now free to roam the world. Heh. You'll probably only get as far as Fantasia for a while..maybe Valley Fair...oh, and now you get to go to the River! YAY!
I'm happy for you. Heh! I'm happy for me! I'm just happy. And thirsty.
February 14, 2002
Matt Aelseth once shared with me his ideas on choosing where to serve. I'm still searching these out biblically, but this is a starting point. I think I'm the type of person that when presented with an apparent need, I will do anything I can to meet that need. It's my Messiah complex. My dreams of being a superhero and being able to help everyone and do everything.
But, alas, I am more Matt Murdock, Clark Kent, Bruce Wayne and less guys with capes in tights. Ha. Wait, they're all men. Anyhow. Moving on.
Back to Matt Aelseth. So, Matt's whole framework is: serve in 3 ministries maximum - 2 major and 1 minor. Of the 2 majors, one should be something that God's given you a passion for. The other should be where there is a need. Disclaimer: These are his guidelines, they're not rules of any sort. I just remember him sharing with me that ministry (at least official, program type ministry) should not consume us. We live in an age that is frought with agendas and meetings. And even in Christian/church culture, it is easy to get swept up in those types of ministries. If there is an apparent need in an area where God has really given you the Spiritual gifts, relational networks, and talents to meet that need, it's so easy to jump in and to "do." But, where is the faith required in that?
And passion. Well..that's passion. Part of fanning into flame the gift of God that is in you (2 Tim 1).
Needs are around us everywhere. The homeless man on the street, the old lady crossing the street, the guy on crutches trying to open a door to Dwinelle, the roommate who just wants to talk, the faucet that keeps dripping. And with the power of Christ, we have enough strength to do it. But, the fundamental question is: are we supposed to do it all? When I was in school, I used to respond with "But how could you not? If it's in your means to help, how could you not?"
A few points to this:
1. We tend to try to control the situation by always jumping in to help. God will raise up workers in time. (Yes, sometimes, you are that person.) He brings us to points that require faith. As we see a need, but come to see that it is not for us to meet, then our responsibility is to pray over that need. That's where the faith comes in.
2. Related to this, I know that my impetus to try to meet all these needs stems from pride. I touched on this earlier with my whole superhero complex thing. It comes from a sense of self-sufficiency. I have the means, so I will do it. And that is sin.
Gosh, this is all over the place. So, I'll stop here. I'm still sorting through some examples from Scripture. I'll edit this later. Umm..yeah. sorry. Cool...my page is starting to talk with other pages...If i've said anything blasphemous or questionable, please tell me.
But, alas, I am more Matt Murdock, Clark Kent, Bruce Wayne and less guys with capes in tights. Ha. Wait, they're all men. Anyhow. Moving on.
Back to Matt Aelseth. So, Matt's whole framework is: serve in 3 ministries maximum - 2 major and 1 minor. Of the 2 majors, one should be something that God's given you a passion for. The other should be where there is a need. Disclaimer: These are his guidelines, they're not rules of any sort. I just remember him sharing with me that ministry (at least official, program type ministry) should not consume us. We live in an age that is frought with agendas and meetings. And even in Christian/church culture, it is easy to get swept up in those types of ministries. If there is an apparent need in an area where God has really given you the Spiritual gifts, relational networks, and talents to meet that need, it's so easy to jump in and to "do." But, where is the faith required in that?
And passion. Well..that's passion. Part of fanning into flame the gift of God that is in you (2 Tim 1).
Needs are around us everywhere. The homeless man on the street, the old lady crossing the street, the guy on crutches trying to open a door to Dwinelle, the roommate who just wants to talk, the faucet that keeps dripping. And with the power of Christ, we have enough strength to do it. But, the fundamental question is: are we supposed to do it all? When I was in school, I used to respond with "But how could you not? If it's in your means to help, how could you not?"
A few points to this:
1. We tend to try to control the situation by always jumping in to help. God will raise up workers in time. (Yes, sometimes, you are that person.) He brings us to points that require faith. As we see a need, but come to see that it is not for us to meet, then our responsibility is to pray over that need. That's where the faith comes in.
2. Related to this, I know that my impetus to try to meet all these needs stems from pride. I touched on this earlier with my whole superhero complex thing. It comes from a sense of self-sufficiency. I have the means, so I will do it. And that is sin.
Gosh, this is all over the place. So, I'll stop here. I'm still sorting through some examples from Scripture. I'll edit this later. Umm..yeah. sorry. Cool...my page is starting to talk with other pages...If i've said anything blasphemous or questionable, please tell me.
February 8, 2002
For one who likes to talk, I have a difficult time articulating myself. I have a lot of trouble succinctly and accurately saying the things jumbled up in my head. To make a point, I normally have to make five statements before I can get to the heart of the matter. Usually, those five statements don't make much sense.
My inability to express myself has become rather frustrating as of late. I feel like I haven't really had an outlet to share honestly and openly. Most of the time, I know that this thoughts page is not the mechanism. It's somewhat awkward for me to talk to an unidentified readership. Digressing, again. See? Back to the frustration issue. I'm not poetic, nor creative, nor artistic, nor articulate. There are days when I wish I could do something like paint, to illustrate how I feel and what I'm thinking.
Alinna was telling me about her students the other day. She teaches high schoolers. She was telling me how her kids will start to explain something. But, then, they'll get frustrated. They'll say things like, "So the emperor of Japan - I can't remember his name - met with his council...ergh....umm...uh....(silence)...uhh...I dunno. I forget." Al tells me that it's not that they don't know the answer. They just can't explain it. They get frustrated and a little panicked along the way. And then it happens, the thought comes to a screeching halt.
When the thought train in my head crashes into a brick wall, I just get tired. Rather than trying to back up and explain myself again, I opt to just let it go, trying to move the conversation forward. I have now frustrated a good number of people by doing this. Part of it is my own pride. I'm embarassed by the fact that I'm inarticulate. Ultimately, I just feel stupid. Going back over the conversation only makes me feel like more of an idiot. I'd rather just move on. But, most of the time, the person/people I'm talking to aren't quite ready to move on.
Maybe I should go back to kindergarten and re-learn how to express myself. Maybe I should finger paint.
My inability to express myself has become rather frustrating as of late. I feel like I haven't really had an outlet to share honestly and openly. Most of the time, I know that this thoughts page is not the mechanism. It's somewhat awkward for me to talk to an unidentified readership. Digressing, again. See? Back to the frustration issue. I'm not poetic, nor creative, nor artistic, nor articulate. There are days when I wish I could do something like paint, to illustrate how I feel and what I'm thinking.
Alinna was telling me about her students the other day. She teaches high schoolers. She was telling me how her kids will start to explain something. But, then, they'll get frustrated. They'll say things like, "So the emperor of Japan - I can't remember his name - met with his council...ergh....umm...uh....(silence)...uhh...I dunno. I forget." Al tells me that it's not that they don't know the answer. They just can't explain it. They get frustrated and a little panicked along the way. And then it happens, the thought comes to a screeching halt.
When the thought train in my head crashes into a brick wall, I just get tired. Rather than trying to back up and explain myself again, I opt to just let it go, trying to move the conversation forward. I have now frustrated a good number of people by doing this. Part of it is my own pride. I'm embarassed by the fact that I'm inarticulate. Ultimately, I just feel stupid. Going back over the conversation only makes me feel like more of an idiot. I'd rather just move on. But, most of the time, the person/people I'm talking to aren't quite ready to move on.
Maybe I should go back to kindergarten and re-learn how to express myself. Maybe I should finger paint.
